Self loathing

I’ve been drinking again and I fucking hate it. I hate it so much. Why do I keep poisoning myself like this? When will I stop! I a solid not ever want to drink alcohol again, not a single drop, but in a few days this changes. There are reasons why I drank last night, and last week, and the week before , but ultimate all just excuses, there’s a lot more real reasons to not drink. I won’t list them now as my head hurts typing and I have to keep running to the toilet every 5 minutes. Let’s just get.through.today.

😞

Published by Sober Singer

A 30-something year old mum of 3 on a mission to life life alcohol free

10 thoughts on “Self loathing

  1. I could have written this today. Awake at 5.00 popping pills to get through the day and thought about writing a similar post. Hope you feel better soon and that we can both stop this stupid cycle.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. Sorry sweetie. I’ve been there for sure – enough times to recognize the cycle of how just a few days after feeling awful and not ever wanting to drink, drinking seems like a good idea again. From the many other accounts I’ve read of people who have successfully quit, you just need to get through that first month or so and not drink NO MATTER WHAT and then it gets easier….?

    Liked by 1 person

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